A Friday Sermon

Aren’t you excited? Like these guys...from the 70's?

Hey? Hey? Hey?

It's Cream Girls 70's party tonight and I shaved my little face into a Magnum P.I.

My moustie aka. 70's moustache is complete...I'll have to think about posting the pics!?!

Happy Weekend Readers!

Happiness is sterri nappiness.

There are worse ways to spend a cold, Wednesday evening, you know?

- interject -

It's November, Readers, and Johannesburg is a comfortable miserable 10'C. What.the.fnuck?

- exitude -

Dudes.

So Cream Girl and I watched the Gareth Cliff Show last night, only because one of her mates was in the audience - we felt more like victims of it!
Slightly bored with the sudden editing cuts and 'move to's' we thought it would be fun to send in random text messages to see if they pop up on that little insert screen...

'Happiness is sterri nappiness, Gareth!'

'Is that Mike Naiker's sister???'

'Love that dinner jacket, Gareth - Camoni Naidoo, Chatsworth'

Childish? Absolutely...we were canning ourselves!

Someone else was clearly on the same fun page when we noticed these text message's scrolling across the screen...

'The audience is fed by Nando's!'

'The panel is dressed by Gareth Cliff!'

Can't the panel dress themselves?
As much as we think you're the business on radio, G, your TV show is well bad.

Today, I'm going to see my little nephew. So excited. Can't wait to meet the little guy. Tonight we'll have a couple drinks with the proud farther - it is feel for the drink Thursday after all. My brother is so much of excited to have a son. Kid is going to get spoilt rotten.

Pooh.

Milk was a bad choice.

Today, I become an Uncle - again - to my little nephew.

Shites, an uncle of one, a god-farther to another. I'm excited.

Cream Girl and I went for dinner at my folks last night. My niece was staying with them as my brother and wife were getting their last nights sleep in before the little guy arrives. Shame, kids are hell-of-a intuitive at young ages. She knew something wasn't right and was throwing proper fits...Cream Girl and I, as much as we love our sibkids, realised that the responsibility of children is something you'd only want when you're ready...if it ever happens like that.

There have been milk issues around the office.

And milk is something you just don't mess with. Yesterday, it got quite heated and Cooksister - yes, I work with my sister - had to step-in and lay down some ground rules.

"Don't mess with the milk," she said, "I'll fuck you up with this Woolies Oat Snap biscuit I'm holding, ok!?"

God, when are people going to realise...

...I digress. We had a good laugh.

I'm growing a little moustie - moustache - for Cream Girls year end function on Friday. It's a 70's theme...fuck it's funny. I only started on Thursday, and already it as bushy as some of these chops who've been posting Movemeber photo's of themselves on Facebook...hilarious.

They look like they've been scratching on bits of dry coqui pen. Grow-up guys! We're men for god's sake! Stop looking for attention!

Cheesus.

I remember, the days of my life.

Most 'good' people I know have either owned, or driven a VW.

I had a Beetle.

Towards the end of school, and 1st year varsity I had a little green bug. Complete with mags, sweet upholstery, and a sound system that would blow the skirts of any Lenasian!

When Volkswagen broadcast that famous advert 20 years ago on South African television, it hit the compassionate nail in everyones head.

Cars.are.memories.

We'll miss the Citi Golf, South Africa and it's car-jackers.



Magic. Moments. People.

The Butchering of our National Anthem

You probably watched it live, seen or heard about it in the news.

But you can bitch and moan all you like, at the end of the day, Ras Dumisani, if you ever sing our national anthem again...you'll have one of those bongo drums inlodged in your cake hole.

Disgusting.

I had an average weekend, with very little sleep...

...zzzzzz ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!

Click the image to hear the Butchering.

There's a She Wolf in my closet HOLY CRAP!!!

Last night...

...I went to the Baron, Fredman. Downed a Hansa Draft - gotta love the kiss of the saraz hop - and realised. Joburg storms are the fucking business.

This afternoon...

...I go to the 20:20 Cricket against England at Wanderes. God bless Cream Girl and her influencialness. (word?)

Tomorrow morning...

...us 4 buggars - The Captain, The Animal, and the Animals Cousin - drive to Dullstroom for a bit of light fishing and some extreme Scrabble.

On Sunday...

...I'll feel like shit.

Right now...

...Happy Weekend, Readers.

Remember...If you're going, to San Francisco, be sure to wear, some flowers in.your.hair!

Morning glory.

The Business and The Berries

Firstly, let me say that I only post pictures of exposed fillets because I love you.

Secondly, please take some time out to visit my mates photographic blog - Brazen, I know you will. Him and his bird are travelling South America and taking some awesome pics, as well as sharing some great stories and experiences - Four Drops of This

Thirdly, I want to share this rather dramtic news article with you. Cops Joy at 'Rolex' Arrest - Gang suspect held after dramatic chase through Sandton

This all happened right outside Cream Girls office window. Just after she got back from lunch. She sent me an email saying...

"Oh my hat! There is a massive shootout right outside our offices on west, heard serious gun shots but we can’t see anything cause the trees are in the way..."

This is South Africa, Readers. Accept it.

When I first got this email, I panicked. Uncontrolled thoughts and worry run through your mind, because you're not there to understand what's going on. But if I was there, I would be standing on the balcony trying to see what the fuss is just the same, pissed off that the trees are blocking the view, and curious as to why people are running in all directions.

This, my dear comrades, is an excellent example of how use to this we've become.

Well done to the cops for finally catching this fucker. May he rot in prison.

Lastly, I have nothing against Canadia or Canadians, they're lovely folk...it's a reference I use to speak about certain...people...so.to.say.

Cheap.

Something extra because that bum is freakin' me out now!

Um, yep! Comic humour compliments of the boys @ Explosm

Wow! We have some serious plumbers bum!

We were witness to this at lunch yesterday! Holy mother of god...that's a ditch!

That may be the 8th natural wonder of the world!

Tell me this, don't you feel a draft running across your exposed skin? Do you tell him/her to cover those fillets up so we can all enjoy our lunch? Or do you take a picture?

Shit, karma's going to send a runaway hubcap up my nose!

That boot needs a pot plant and a water feature! Forgive me.

Serio-anus.

TS. No Bellakanoose comic today, sorry. Ches & Custard are on vacation in Belize trying to find the answer to life, the universe and malva pudding.

FEEL GOOD INC.

I suffered a bit of ridicule yesterday...kick it! I have reason to feel good.

Seeing as it’s the ‘final’ month of the year - the one before we all set off on our various annual holidays - I thought I’d share a few 10 reason’s for feeling the business with you.
And hope my Readers (that's you!), leave me with your reason/s here after…


I have the most wonderful and gorgeous girlfriend - fuck yes, a bit of sop for you ladies ;)
I have endless bush-time over December to look forward too.
I’m seeing The Killers live, in Joburg!
I have new adventures and opportunities on the horizon for 2010.
We have 2010!
I got to travel & see Vietnam.
I am in ~love~ [Does that scare you?]
I become an uncle, again, in 10 days – maybe sooner!
The Moose's are out grazing their sour maple leaves in Canada!
I found my car key! {not so stupid now!}

The berries?

Incorporated.